My friends and I went to a birthday party last night. The girl having it rented a house in the beach area for a week to celebrate. The parents were even there at the party making sure everyone had a drink and they even had a ton of food out for everyone to just munch on. Trays of rice, chips, enchiladas, rolled tacos, mini chimichangas, etc. The food there was so good.

Unfortunately, I remembered that I had the drugs in my back pocket and I indulged a little bit. Well… maybe a lot. I took every single one that night but I shared a couple halves with some people that wanted one. I felt bad for doing them but I wasn’t really in the mood to drink at first and I wanted to be in some form of altered mindset but then, I started drinking a lot. I remember almost nothing from the last part of the night and blacking out isn’t really good for your health. It must mean something is wrong (maybe too much alcohol in your bloodstream which runs to your brain? idk) when you drink to the extent of blacking out.

Well, its never easy to quit something and this is no different.

Oh, and I’m not sure if my gaydar is that great or not, but it did go off a couple of times at this party. Actually, more so than at a normal party. I think there were some gay guys but I didn’t mingle enough to get to know any of them. Darn, I missed a chance… but it won’t happen again.

I also found out that one of my friends has been telling our mutual friends that I’m gay. I’ve only told two people and they must have told her and she spread the “news” to some of the people we know. I guess I know not to tell anyone any secrets anymore to them if I want to keep them secret. It kind of pissed me off and I don’t really know how to deal with it…

PS. Here’s what turned me on today courtesy of ItsAllGay.com.
Photo courtesy of knispen.webuptodate.com.

[347]